Professional piano and raising a family

Hi Jonathan, thanks for your thoughtful message. I am a young dad of two boys under 2 and I consider myself to be a professional musician. My main income comes from being a church music director and teaching lessons, but I am currently performing regularly (mostly self-promoted) and competing in some competitions. My wife works in campus ministry. Yes, finding time to practice is difficult but doable. On a good day, I can get an average of three hours in. I have found that having children has really helped me to be effective with practicing more than when I was single. I waste less time noodling and mindlessly repeating passages. I often record myself with a particular passage and verbalize out-loud areas for improvement/adjustment. And then I record again on my phone keeping those verbalized objectives in mind. What use to take me a few hours can take me about 10min. And my kids have actually sparked a new sense of creativity and freedom at the instrument.

My wife has supported me in carving out time for annual summer music festivals that allow participants over 25+ (e.g. Vivace music festival is a great one, even though I was one of the older participants). I have also joined adult chamber groups in the city I live in, and I recently formed a informal performance club where my colleagues (from different churches, schools, music clubs, etc.) and I get to share our progress with pieces regularly and receive feedback. I discovered that there are a lot of adult musicians in our position who are hungry for opportunities like this, so maybe consider starting a group like that for starters. I basically try to recreate the conservatory or academic environment without being in school. 

I hope this helps a little. I am in solidarity with you as a fellow father! It is totally doable to be a professional musician and a family person.

Hello Jonathan,

Thanks for the thoughtful question. I struggled with this too when I was the father of young children. I am also a music teacher in a public high school. This is my perspective as a musician, Christian, husband, and teacher. Playing classical music if wonderful, but not much appreciated today. There seems to be shrinking opportunities and a lack of appreciation for persons with our skill set (e.g. even churches don't want us anymore because they play rock and roll, no longer do they sing hymns). I believe God puts us on earth for a purpose. The first is to know him through the Lord Jesus Christ. After having this perspective realignment for myself personally, I know that having a family and providing for a family is an important part of my purpose. There is a tension between raising a family & practicing, but I believe the wife & kids have to come first. Although I have experienced frustration teaching in the public schools, I also have been able to touch many more lives with music than I could ever have pursuing performance. I believe this is also part of God's purpose for me. It is very difficult to provide for a family as a musician unless you have a steady job, such as in the schools, church, or university. Even then, it can be difficult. I have a buddy much more talented than I who plays with local symphonies, went to Julliard, won international competitions, was a professor at a university, etc. who just lost his job by being denied tenure. He is currently doing computer programming. I hope this helps. God bless