How do many of you deal with performance anxiety?

I have a problem staying focused when I play in front of people. even when I play in my own home. I play okay, but I find that I lose my focus because I keep wondering how I sound to those listening to me. I make mistakes that I would never make in practice. Some are mistakes I never made before. How do some of you stay so focused? Is it just because I need more experience playing in front of people or are there other methods you all use?

69 replies

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    • Unfrozen Barroom Piano Player
    • Peter_G
    • Yesterday
    • Reported - view

    It is very easy to state the solution to this problem, although that solution can be very difficult to implement:

    The only way that I am aware of to get less anxious, and better at performing, is to perform!

    I too, am familiar with the high anxiety that accompanies a live performance, and also with those things that inexplicably go wrong when performing, which have almost always gone right in practice. 

    With repeated performances, some of these tendencies and patterns become more familiar, and thereby much less inexplicable,  then you can start to develop strategies to counteract them.

    As a veteran of many performances that have gone off the rails, I feel qualified to speak on this subject! Here are some of the things I’ve observed running through my mind just before some calamity takes place: 

    “I wonder how this is coming across to the audience, are they bored, annoyed, excited, impressed? OOPS now where am I?”  

    “whew, I just made it through that difficult part that I had been so worried about, congratulations to me – yikes here’s the next section and I forgot to set it up the way I like”

    ”oh oh here comes this section that always gives me trouble, now what was it that I thought I just learned about it last night?”

    ”oh no I’m blanking on the specific details of this part, is muscle memory going to carry me through?”

    “this section always goes better if I don’t think about, so try not to think about it, try not to think about it ARGHH I’m thinking about it!!”

    and so forth.  Basically, these are all instances of distractions, creeping in because of the unfamiliar environment of performing. With practice at the skill of performing itself, you can start to see some of them coming, and nip them in the Bud by reminding yourself to get your attention back on the music.

      • Larry_K
      • 15 hrs ago
      • Reported - view

       I think you can induce the change in the brain without going under the knife. 
       

      I think  did it with barroom playing, if I am not mistaken. 

      • Noel_Nguyen
      • 15 hrs ago
      • Reported - view

        I'm sure  still feels the anxiety sometimes even in barroom playing, but maybe I'm wrong; I sure hope I am, for Pete's sake! (See what I did there.) Maybe he has solved that problem by now! Perhaps you can tell where you are in that specific journey, Peter?

      Edit: I'm only saying this because I believe it is extremely rare to see an anxiety-free public performance, simply because the stakes are higher than during practice. I believe it would be like somebody walking on a two-feet wide plank at a high altitude (from which a fall would cause injury) without feeling any anxiety.

      • Andrew_Smith
      • 10 hrs ago
      • Reported - view

       Alex Honnold has repeatedly explained the MRI/amygdala results -- he says he has been plenty scared at times when climbing, does fear falling --dying-- but that he simply didn't experience fear in the MRI because he knew it was just a bunch of images and not real danger. So he is clear-headed about what poses a genuine versus a virtual threat. I have a nephew who was gifted at guitar and didn't get the least bit nervous -- but he also stated that he didn't really care that much about it either. So I think one root of the problem (which I have struggled with, but also occasionally performed in a relaxed state) is associating/tying our identity and self-worth to performance.  Most people develop performance anxiety only in adolescence, when identity formation is becoming more solidified. And for me, I performed with less anxiety as a 20 year old than a 50 year old. The subject can all get quite complex, but paradoxically simple at the same time. 

      • Larry_K
      • 8 hrs ago
      • Reported - view

       Well, it begs the question of why other people’s amygdalas light up when shown those images, as they also know that they’re fake and do not constitute real danger.

      I don’t think Alex has given a sufficient answer. I’d like to hear from a neurologist.

      Clearly, Alex’s fear does not affect his performance, at least not yet. He drilled that climb many times with ropes and memorized all of the steps. You could almost call it a score. :)

      • Mom, fitness instructor, lover of music
      • Michelle_Russell
      • 6 hrs ago
      • Reported - view

       That's right! I had forgotten about that! 

    • Noel_Nguyen
    • Yesterday
    • Reported - view
     said:
    also don't completely share your fatalistic view point. 

    Oh I wouldn't want you to share it! I'm the type to expect the worst (perhaps because of my training as a physician) and then often be pleasantly surprised. 

    • Noel_Nguyen
    • Yesterday
    • Reported - view

    Already 7 members in "my" group now! I think we may stop recruiting for now, because I remember the meetings were too long with the 10+ group, even when not everyone is playing each time! 

    These things change all the time anyway, so I will let y'all know whenever we recruit again. Thanks for interest! We're all in it mostly for ourselves anyway 😄.

    • Noel_Nguyen
    • Yesterday
    • Reported - view
     said:
    I don't really have performance anxiety, so I can't really relate to making mistakes because I am nervous.  

    That is an extraordinary gift, Maria!! Too bad we won't hear you at the upcoming Liszt challenge. But I understand you have many big pieces to prepare at the same time, and I certainly look forward to seeing your grand entrance at the next community concert!

      • Akzent oder Diminuendo?
      • Maria_F
      • Yesterday
      • Reported - view

       I also wish I were able to participate in the Liszt challenge! I have been working on the Chasse-Neige cadenza and still plan to finish Paysage for the October portion of the Liszt project!

      • Noel_Nguyen
      • 15 hrs ago
      • Reported - view

        It will happen when it will happen. But really I encourage you to not wait too long, if only for selfish reasons 😆. You could submit a short clip, even an excerpt. It shouldn't be difficult for you since you don't have performance anxiety, right? 

      • Akzent oder Diminuendo?
      • Maria_F
      • 15 hrs ago
      • Reported - view

       The only reason it is difficult is that I need to decide what to perform and actually record it!

      • Noel_Nguyen
      • 15 hrs ago
      • Reported - view

        Yes that's a very good reason.

    • Unfrozen Barroom Piano Player
    • Peter_G
    • 8 hrs ago
    • Reported - view
     said:
    I think Peter Golemme did it with barroom playing, if I am not mistaken

       On the one hand, it is true that I could walk into a bar/restaurant/cocktail lounge/  right now, without any preparation, and sit down and play all night without a moment's hesitation or the slightest anxiety.  But put me on a stage or on a video camera for a Community Concert to play something I've practiced hundreds of times, and I am as much a nervous wreck as anyone on this thread.  Also, when I go to make a recording, whether of classical repertoire or of a standard tune that I can toss off effortlessly in a bar, I become very stiff and tense and find it extremely difficult to capture the spontanaeity and relaxation that are necessary for a good performance.

    The key difference in these scenarios is that, in a bar or restaurant etc. nobody is really listening very closely.  The customers were there for mostly other reasons and I was there to fill in the background. (This was very hard to accept in my younger days, when I saw myself as an "artist" stepping out onto a stage to be the center of attention ; ---many times I had to be told to turn down the intensity and volume because it was interfering with people's dinners or conversations ☹️) .

    Even if they did come to listen, the noisy background, could mask a lot of defects in execution,  wrong notes, dropped beats or other infelicities.  In contrast, on the concert stage, everyone is there for the express purpose of listening, and will be paying close attendtion.

    Another factor is HABITUATION. You will inevitably become less anxious about performing the more often you do it. My gig in the Vermont ski lodge really habituated me quickly to this kind of setting, as I had to play 7 nights a week 8 hours a night, for the whole season, with only a few random nights off.

    It's difficult to become habituated to playing in a concert setting when you only get to do it a few times a year. It should be done repeatedly within a relatively short time span in order to become habitual.  That's one reason I encourage everyone to participate as much as possible in the ToneBase concerts, and it's why I'm excited about the prospect of participating in a Zoom group.  These are priceless opportunities to perform for a knowledgeable & friendly audience, with rather low stakes if the performance doesn't go well.

      • Larry_K
      • 8 hrs ago
      • Reported - view

       Thanks for explaining your background.

      I understand completely why you could sit and play for eight hours in a bar but have difficulty playing in front of an audience on here. 

      You still have a tremendous amount of experience performing for people and I believe it helps you in all performance situations.

      I have basically zero experience playing for people, unless you count my wife as the audience. 

      I played a little something for someone we invited to dinner. His response was, it sounds like a student recital. I took that as compliment but I think it was a cutting remark that indicated I was not playing like a professional.

      I now see that wild horses could not drag me to perform live on here and, in all likelihood, I have wasted a $1000 on recording equipment and will never make a video. 

      But, hey, maybe I’ll make a video in a couple of years.

      • Unfrozen Barroom Piano Player
      • Peter_G
      • 7 hrs ago
      • Reported - view

       Larry I'm sure your friend was being complimentary, and that you are most likely looking through your own lens of sefl-criticism to find a way to interpret it negatively. 

      I would encourage you strongly to put that recording equipment to good use.  Whatever you end up recording will be uniquely YOU and could preserve a valuable memento for your future reference as well as for your loved ones after you are gone. 

      (when you get to be my age you start to think a lot about what you would like to leave behind as a legacy)

      • hot4euterpe
      • 7 hrs ago
      • Reported - view

       I agree with Peter. I am sure your friend was being complimentary. It would be an odd sort of person that expects professional level playing from anyone other than a professional! To most non-musicians, we are all wizards regardless of ability or execution. 

      I do find it common with adult students that they hold themselves to incredibly high standards. It can be hard to let go of this. However, if you can find a way to give in and share 'imperfect' work, you will often find it starts to lead to noticeable improvement. Self judgement is almost like an infection of our own ability to learn... and it festers. 

      • Mom, fitness instructor, lover of music
      • Michelle_Russell
      • 6 hrs ago
      • Reported - view

         I'm really not one to talk here, since I haven't performed since I had one disastrous community concert appearance  many months ago. And honestly, after that experience I decided I wouldn't perform publicly (except to premiere the charming Sonatina Thurmond wrote for me!) for a while. I'm going to try again in Noel's Zoom group on Saturday! Yikes.

      But what I popped in to say was something my amazing vocal teacher told me early on in lessons, which isn't a perfect analogy for playing piano in public but might prove useful if you can adjust it to a secular setting. So, I sing nearly every Sunday at church (solo, we don't have a choir), and before the first time I was to sing solo last year my teacher had, as he always does, offered to be available by phone or even a short video check-in if I needed anything - even a pep talk. Well, he gave me the pep talk early, and I haven't needed another one since. One thing he said was that precision and eloquence are secondary to being there and delivering the melody: "People need this music; it's a very complicated world and churches are amazing places because it's where we...attack the most looming existential questions of what it means to be human. That's why we use music so much in churches because it works on a level that goes way below the level of language, symbolism, logic...and for those of us who have some sort of belief, there's even a sense of the power of the universe itself and your form of a higher power working through that music." 

      Thurmond and I talk regularly about how much the world needs music. I think this is one reason he doesn't get nervous in the way most of us seem to. He knows that it's not about him. He's just delivering a message (so to speak). And that's essentially what my vocal teacher was saying about singing. We give what we can and those who hear it get what they need from the music, regardless of our competence. We are delivering the beauty and the message given to us by the composer to a world that is in desperate need of what music can give.

      • Larry_K
      • 4 hrs ago
      • Reported - view

        

      I appreciate all of your kind words. 

      While I would like to believe my neighbor was saying something complimentary, I am afraid that he was not. You see, he is a professor, a professor of architecture, and he has high standards. 

      He has the ability to say exactly the wrong thing, an ability that I thought was unique to myself, lol. 

      So, what he said wasn’t a ringing endorsement of my playing. That’s fine, I can accept that.

      As for my legacy, I am satisfied that there are no physical traces of the three decades I have spent playing various musical instruments. I feel that lack fits the ephemeral nature of music.

      As for struggling with my future nonexistence, well, I do that every day. A few people who loved me will miss me, but, of course, I will be forgotten.

      I hope that I can leave enough money to get my wife and autistic older brother to the ends of their lives. Besides that, I won’t leave much of anything.

      As for publicly performing, well, I just started with a new teacher. I would liken the process to that of an old car that has been completely disassembled and tested on the component level.

      As the components have been found wanting, it will be a long time before I am reassembled and ready to drive again. 

      I have set aside all of the intermediate material and have gone back to easier material.

      Who knows, I may well emerge stronger and running better.

    • Unfrozen Barroom Piano Player
    • Peter_G
    • 8 hrs ago
    • Reported - view
     said:
     always happy to read your well written and thoughtful posts 😊 and many things you have written here I find relatable.

     thank you Priya, that's a really nice thing to say.  I often worry that my posts are too long and discursive for readers to tolerate. No one has ever accused me of being too succinct. But I am simply so happy to have this community of musicians here at TB to talk these things over with. There are no other musicians in my family or my immediate circle of friends and co-workers, and, much as I may love them all, conversations like this would have virtually no meaning to them.

    I am familiar with all those symptoms you talk about. Sometimes me knees are bouncing so much I can barely hold the pedal down, or they lock up against the underside of the keyboard. That's when I really have to implement some conscious relaxation techniques or else I will be too tightened up to play anything. 

    I must say that in our community concerts you have projected a very calm demeanor despite the emotional intensity of the music you are playing.  So I would say that the increased exposure to performing has served you well, and I hope you are able to find a sympatico group soon.!

Content aside

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